As the crisis continues...

        I've been having bad dreams at night.  Not exactly nightmares, but disturbing dreams.  Most of them seem to center around relationships from the past, people who were once part of my life but aren't anymore.  Some of the dreams are fairly realistic: exploring what would happen if we met up again.  Others are completely unrealistic and travel down weird roads and situations that are just not realistic at all.  I know I'm not alone in having bad or disturbing dreams.  Other people have shared with me that this has been one of their experiences of this crisis time as well.
       Any trauma can bring up for us all the traumas of the past; any unknown time can bring up everything that was unsure, uneasy, or unresolved from the past; any time of fear can raise in us a need to try to heal or fix anything from our lives that has not been dealt with sufficiently.  I think that at some level, no matter what the crisis, trauma causes us to look at our mortality and to try to work through what we want dealt with before we leave this life.  Sometimes our dreams are a way to try to work through some of those things.  Sometimes dreams are invitations to look more closely in our waking hours at our past so we can walk with more confidence and wholeness into whatever future we may have for however long we may have it.  Maybe the challenges of this time, the traumas of this season are affecting you in different ways or manifesting for you in different ways, but for me, the challenges of today seem to be manifesting especially through disturbing dreams.
       As always with the things that challenge or disturb, I see in them a calling.  For me, one of the callings in this present disturbance is to do more real and important life work than maybe normal times allow us to do.  I see in my disturbing dreams an invitation for healing and reconciliation, a call to reach out to those I haven't spoken to in a while, a chance to really do some of the inner work, healing and peacemaking that we are always called to do as part of our human journeys.  I know there are some relationships that cannot be attended to.  I know there are some situations that it are best  turned over to God for healing.  I do believe that relationships that cannot be dealt with directly still can be healed within ourselves, and I also believe that God is active in healing all relationships when we are serious about doing that work.  Still, there are people who we might not have connected with in a long time, and this time may be an invitation to reach out.  And there are many relationships and situations that can be healed directly through conversation, the making of amends, the offering of apologies and forgiveness, and the work of grace.
      I find myself remembering the good about many people I haven't talked to in a long time.  I find I am missing folk I haven't been with in a long time.  Mostly, I am feeling incredibly grateful for all the people who have touched my life: some for a short time, some for a longer time, some for my life time. For all of you who have graced my journey, I am grateful.  I am grateful whether my time with you was for growing, was for learning or was for healing.  I am who I am because of my time with each of you.  I will grow into who I will be because of our interactions, whether they were positive or negative.  For all that you are and do and have done, I offer thanks.