Restorative Justice at the College Level

           For my youngest child's spring break we went and looked at colleges that had interested her.  Without naming names, I want to talk about one of those colleges very briefly.  Most of what this college had to say for itself was very positive and seemed like a good match for Youngest.  They talked about being inclusive and aware, though aparently one of their professors had made an inappropriate comment in a fit of anger that was caught on video and was being shown all over the place.  

           This college also talked about using a restorative model for justice on campus rather than a retributive model.  I've written about this before, but to explain again: In a retributive model for justice, misdeeds, mistakes, errors are dealt with by punishing the person who made the error.  Those who use this method seek revenge on the person, often an escalated revenge of what was done in the first place.  This model has many problems with it, beginning with the fact that punishment simply does not work to effectively change behavior.  In fact, the extremely high rate of recidivism in the United States prisons, for example, shows that the punishment we exact on our prisoners ends up cementing their identity as criminals most of the time.  They then have extremely little chance of changing, doing better, or choosing a different way of life.  We also make it almost impossible for those who've been incarcerated to find housing, jobs, or a way of getting out of that system.  We make them into criminals, even if they weren't actually criminals before.  It is also estimated that at least 10% of those who end up incarcerated are not actually guilty of the crimes they were incarcerated for.  Additionally, our retributive system does not provide healing for the victims either.  In our legal system, in fact, our retributive justice system usually ends up revictimizing the victims as they must tell their story in a court of law and have that story attacked and dismantled by lawyers seeking to defend the accused.  

        In contrast to the restributive justice system, a restorative model seeks to understand and provide healing for both victims and those who have done wrong.  There are still consequences for the offenders.  But the consequences tend of be logical or natural consequences: ways for the offenders to correct their mistakes, fix them, look at their own issues that caused the offenders to behave badly in the first place, and invites them to choose to start on a different path.  

       Many of our native tribes (throughout the world!  New Zealand has a wonderful restorative justic program based on the methods of the Maori) have used a restorative model rather than a retributive model with great success.  It sees everyone involved as people not "bad guys" and "good guys" but human beings, all in need of growth and healing.

       Our child development strategies are tending more and more towards a restorative model as we learn that children act out when there is something that needs healing, something that needs training, something that needs help.  It has moved from identifying kids as simply "bad" or "good" into recognizing that all of us are mixes of bad and good and are all on a path of growth.  Many of our schools are also learning and moving more towards a restorative rather than a retributive model.  For example, rather than expelling a child who has done wrong, many schools now work with the child, their family, the victims, and the school system to try to understand what wrong has happened and to do the work to make sure the offenders are not continuing in their behavior.  They are also working more to help the victims obtain healing help.  Expulsion, for many kids, was not only an uneffective punishment, but sometimes was experienced by kids to be a kind of backwards reward.  It encouraged further "bad" behavior rather than correcting what was wrong, teaching more fully about empathy, and helping everyone involved in these situations to heal, grow and do better.  

         So, this college we visited prided itself on teaching and using a restorative model of justice.  It proclaimed that when something happened that was "wrong" that it was explored, analyzed, and addressed individually, working with those who made the mistakes to correct them, to learn from them, and to fix the mistakes rather than to simply be punished, expelled or thrown out as "bad".  

        That's awesome.  I believe deeply in restorative justice and was very excited to find a school that declared its commitment to that system at the outset.

        HOWEVER, many students at the school were protesting, demanding for the firing of the above mentioned professor.  The firing of a teacher follows a retributive model of justice.  It does nothing to correct the problem or even address it.  It does nothing towards healing the victims.  It also simply dismisses the professor, leaving him and his family without income or without a way to correct the problems.  It responds to an error (or even a series of errors) by adding to the list of what is harmful, destructive and angry, rather than offering a way forward that teaches, heals and restores relationships.  It stops conversation, rather than exploring, learning together and working together to truly address the issues in productive and constructive ways.  It also entrenches the professor in a place of simply defending his comments rather than inviting him to do the self-reflection a more restorative process would encourage.  

       I continue to be amazed at the lack of compassion that humans show to one another.  I continue to be deeply saddened by the ease with which people choose to label, categorize and "other" those around them.  This professor stopped being a person to these students.  He is just a "bad guy" now to throw out, another person to be "gotten rid of,"  to punish, to condemn.  It was obvious that for all the rhetoric at the school claiming to follow and teach a restorative justice model that they have not been able to actually instill that value into the student body.  We have a long way to go.

Too Much Judgement

          Over my life-time we have been steadily learning that punishment is not nearly as effective (if it is effective AT ALL) as a combination of positive reinforcement and natural consequences.  We've learned that beating on children, for example, does not improve behavior, but teaches kids to be bullies themselves.  We've learned that natural consequences (you break a toy and then you no longer have it,  you are mean to a friend and you lose that friendship, you spill and you have to clean it up yourself) have a much bigger impact on all of us.  We learn when there are consequences for our actions that are natural.  What children and all of us learn when we are "punished" for things we've done wrong is more to hate, distrust, fear and seek revenge towards the ones who have punished us.  We've learned this, and in many ways we are beginning to live that out more and more fully.  The best parents I know often use mistakes as teaching opportunities, seeing errors as growing and learning experiences rather than as "sins" that need punishment.  But in other ways, we continue to use the archaic and ineffective methods of punishment in dealing with "mistakes".

    With children, for example, we still use some truly ineffective punishments.  I read an article yesterday that went into detail about something I had long ago come to believe: that suspensions and expulsions just teach kids to act out more: they get out of school, the school has made it clear that they don't want the kids there, often the child gets to be home alone while their parents are working, and what kids have learned from this is that the school authorities don't listen, care, or really values them as human beings.  They are being sent away because they aren't wanted.  No one has taken the time to work with them on what went wrong or how to do things differently, they've just dismissed the child.  What child will work harder for those who just dismiss them?  What child will change their behavior when it is clear that they get rewarded with time off when they act out?  It makes no sense.  And studies are finally catching up and showing this to be true.   

    I've also mentioned before that studies also show (see previous posts) that our entire retributive justice system just creates the criminals we are somehow hoping to change by these punitive responses to crimes.  Restorative justice, in contrast, which focuses on natural consequences, healing for the victims and for the perpetrators, restoration of relationships and reconciliation, in great contrast leads to MUCH lower recidivism rates and actually makes a positive difference for all involved.

    But while I've talked about both of the above in detail in the past, I've been thinking about the other ways in which we continue to live out the mistaken thinking that judging, condemning and punishing others is the way to get others to change in the ways we want.

    For example, employee evaluations have, historically, been opportunities for anonymous people to slam someone else rather than effective and helpful opportunities for constructive feedback.  Often, they have not offered helpful critique that allow for growth and change.  And the anonymity of them means that the person receiving the criticisms can not follow through or ask questions that would allow for further clarity or growth.  Additionally, the anonymity of these critiques also encourages normally sane people to take advantage of their "hidden" status to express opinionated, judgmental and often harsh or unkind ideas without recourse or consequences.  Often these are simply the expression of likes and dislikes rather than genuine helpful feedback that would encourage growth.  My own experience with these kinds of evaluations has also been that I'll receive one evaluation with a comment like "Don't talk so loud!" while another writes, "You need to speak up!" or one saying, "Speak more slowly and calmly!" while another says, "You need to be more animated!" Even less helpful are generalizations that offer no specifics, "I don't like her sermons." or "She doesn't lead well."  All of these leave me without any real way to address opposing or non-specific complaints.  

    But even more basic to our current lives is the "dislike" buttons on all social media platforms.  What does "dislike" communicate after all?  It says absolutely nothing that is helpful.  It does not say WHY a person dislikes something.  It doesn't communicate if there was something specific that was not appreciated or if it was the entire thing.  Often people cannot even see on these platforms who it is that said they "disliked" whatever it was.  And more and more I wonder why we have this option.  I have been listening to some incredible music on YouTube lately.  But I always see in these posts a number of "dislikes".  Why do people listen to those posts if they don't like that kind of music?  Why do people bother to be critical and judging at all of a post that may not have been meaningful to them, but which could be so meaningful to so many others?  How are these snap, unclear, and blanket "dislikes" in any way productive, or helpful, or meaningful?

    We are struggling as a country with increased divisions.  I think part of this is a simple failure to communicate with one another.  But a bigger part is that we make quick and full judgments that we don't explain, don't think through and which do not serve those we judge or ourselves either for that matter.  This is a pattern, this is part of our culture, and it seems to bleed into every part of our society.

    There is a reason Jesus said, "do not judge lest ye be judged."  When a society is more focused on judging than on understanding, on condemnation instead of compassion, on tearing one another down, punishing, hurting, seeking revenge, rather than working to build up, communicate, create bridges of reconciliation and healing, then we are doomed to continue these divides that will tear us all apart.

    Bottom line?  We are far too judgmental.  And we are far too quick to "punish" rather than to heal.  Until we get this, until we change, we are heading down a very dangerous path.  God save us all! 

One issue with our school system

     I've had the great gift and privilege of leading a week of music camp for some of the kids Contra Costa Interfaith Housing serves.  As many of you know, I absolutely love working with kids.  I love teaching music.  I really enjoy playing games.  And I love singing.  So combine all four of these things and I'm in my element.  That being said, I knew that these were kids who would undoubtedly come with some challenges (based simply on the hardships they have lived through), and so I was not surprised to find it much more challenging than normal to get and hold their attention, and to consistently expect respectful behavior towards one another or the adults working with them.  That doesn't matter to me.  It's a little more draining, perhaps, but I love the kids all the same and work hard to keep them engaged and having fun.
   During the entire week, we experienced only one real incident of blatant disrespect/difficulty.  One of the older kids (13) was singing in a high, ridiculous, falsetto voice and when confronted he, of course, denied it and said he was doing his best (though I'd heard him the rest of the week and knew he actually sang very well when he chose to).  My 13 year old has been accompanying me this week as a helper and when we got into the car to return home after camp, she told me she really hated kids like that at her school because they were so good at 1. causing trouble and then 2. getting away with it because their protests of innocence are so convincing.  She went on to say that even when these kids are actually caught causing problems at school, they just get rewarded for their bad behavior usually by being sent home for a few days of vacation.  The administrators call it being "suspended" but all the kids know it as "free vacation days".
    The conversation threw me back in time to when my family hit their peek crisis six years ago.  My daughters weathered the storm well, but my son struggled.  He was already challenged with ADHD, sensory integration disorder and depression.  When their father was suddenly and completely gone, when his medication caused a freak out, when the world became overwhelmingly difficult for all of us, my son didn't handle it with ease.  At one point he found himself defending a teacher who had cared for him to another student and my son made the wrong choice of stabbing at the kid with a pencil.  No actual damage was done to the other child, but violence is never excusable, and he was suspended for a few days.  I agree that there had to be a consequence.  No matter what he was going through, violence is not an acceptable option and this needed to be made clear. But what I don't agree with is the consequences that many school systems now use.
        My son, as well as my daughters, both saw him as being rewarded for his behavior, because he was basically given vacation.  Since I had to work, he was given unsupervised vacation where he was allowed free reign of home for three days.  No homework, no school work: just free time to play, or do whatever he wanted.  It was therefore not a surprise to me a few weeks later, when school became challenging again, he purposely set up a situation where he would be suspended a second time so he could have another free vacation.
        I assume the thinking behind "suspension" is that if the kid is home 1.The parents who obviously (sarcasm) caused their child to be "bad" would be punished by having to miss work and having to deal with their kid. 2. The parents, because they would then be suffering loss of money, loss of freedom, would come down hard on the kids and punish the kid themselves.  3. The child would feel humiliated by being sent home and therefore would shape up. 4. The class gets a break from a difficult child for a few days.
       But there are many problems with this thinking.  1. If, in fact, it is the parent's "fault" that the kid is misbehaving, sending the child back to spend even more time with problem parents will exacerbate the problem.  2. If it is not the parents' fault, then the parents are being punished with loss of income (often parents have to stay home with their child and not go to work), with needing to pay for care, or with the fear of having to leave their child at home alone after misbehavior at school.  3. Most of the kids who get into trouble are already struggling at school, struggling to keep up, struggling to stay on top of their learning.  Taking them out of school will only make them farther behind, create a situation where they are learning even less, and increase frustration as they try to make up for lost classroom learning.  4. If, in fact, the removal of the child from the class gives the rest of the class a break, when the child returns, he will not be treated well by his peers, which can cause even more problems for him at school, more acting out, etc.
       There are so many more affective alternatives to this that it frankly baffles the mind why they aren't in place.  There is a school district near ours that "punishes" by requiring community service time.  That makes sense to me: have the kids give back, have them experience and remember that there are other people who are also struggling who choose non-violent responses to their traumas.  I always thought detention was affective; if you have to spend more time in school as a result of behaving badly at school, that works pretty well, especially if during that detention you are doing more school work.  In a restorative justice model, a consequence for bad behavior is for counselors and administrators to spend time with the offender and figure out why they are acting in this way and actually work to bring healing to all involved (offender and potential victims alike).  Natural and logical consequences would say that if a child does vandalism, they are required to clean it up.  If a child hurts another child, they are required to help bring healing to the child harmed.  They may have to go through an anti-bullying program, etc.
        I realize schools in the United States are extremely poorly funded.  I realize that sending a child home is an easy "solution" when a school has limited resources.  I also believe deeply that it does not bring change, does not fix the problems, and does not improve school life for anyone.  My girls see very clearly that bad behavior is being rewarded.  My son experienced that to be true. How can this possibly help?
      I understand that our school districts have many issues, including the very way that we teach, using old methods for a culture that has outgrown them.  This is just one area that needs to be changed.  I know I have no say or authority to encourage a change, but as a parent, I can see that it is ineffective and doesn't work.  Hopefully others will stand up and work for change as well.