Tuesday, December 10, 2019

Advent Repentence

Second Sunday of Advent

Rom.15:7-13

Matthew 3:1-12



What was the point of today’s passage from Romans?  Paul is making a point of God’s grace, God’s love, God’s presence being for the Gentiles as well as for the Jews.

How about the passage from Matthew?  What happens there?  In the passage from the gospel of Matthew John is criticizing the Pharisees and Sadducees.  As Jesus does later, here John is calling them hypocrites. Again, the Pharisees and Sadducees were the religious leaders of the day.  And John is telling them that their religiosity, their stance of faith means nothing because it is not backed up by acts of justice.  It is not supported by their behavior.  The root of their faith is about loving God, loving others, loving.  But they are not acting loving, not behaving with justice in any way.  And he is confronting that hypocrisy.  He then goes on to humble himself saying he is not worthy.  In some ways this is a showing to the Pharisees and Sadducees how they should be behaving themselves.  Because we all have some kind of hypocrisy, none of us get it all right all the time.  The willingness to self-reflect, to look at yourself and see your own hypocrisies, to name and own your own flaws: this is a huge part of being people on the way, people who are loving and caring, people who are growing.

So, the real question here is: What do these passages have in common with one another and more, what does any of it have to do with Advent? 

As we look at every Advent, the Advent call, the Advent promise, is that everything will be thrown on its head.  That those we exclude will be included, and that those who think they have it all together will have to face some very hard truths about who they really are and what God is really asking for them to be. Paul is making the point that the Gentiles as well as the Jews are acceptable to God.  It does not matter to God that they had a different religion, different belief system, and at that time, a different heritage, ethnic background and race. This would have been shocking at the time, it WAS shocking at the time.  But that is what Paul is saying. God has accepted, once again, those deemed unacceptable by the people.  John in today’s gospel reading is confronting the Pharisees and Sadducees’ hypocrisy and saying that their repentance is not genuine, their actions are not supporting their proclamation of being people on the way, people willing to change, people willing to do what God is asking them to do; their behavior is not “bearing the fruit” of love and compassion and grace.

What this has to do with Advent is that Advent, like lent, is a time when we are called to self-reflection, to repentance as a major part in our preparation for Christ’s coming.  We prepare the way for Christ’s coming into our hearts, into our lives, by looking closely at the places that are dark, hypocritical, hidden, “in error” and which need tuning, and sometimes, radical change.  We do this from a place of knowing that we are loved, “accepted” by God regardless of our past, present or anything else.  We are loved, but God is not satisfied to just love us - God calls us to respond to that love, from a place of gratitude, and to be willing to risk changing, and growing and becoming whole.  Because while God accepts us as we are, it is almost impossible for us to accept God into our hearts or really experience God at the deepest level from a place that is unloving, that lacks compassion or grace.  Therefore we must, not because God asks us to, but because there isn’t another way - we MUST repent - change, look at our lives, in order to accept God in in this new way in which God is coming this Christmas.  This isn’t easy.  I understand that.  Yet we are called to do this on a regular basis.  Especially during critical times in the church year.  Advent and lent, in particular, call us to this hard work of repentance.

I’ve talked a little about twelve step programs with you in the past but today I want to talk about them again for a few moments.  As most of you know, the twelve steps provide a way for people with addictions of any kind and even for those who are simply connected or related to those with addictions, to deal with those addictions.  How do they do this?  By asking people to follow the twelve steps as a way to healing.  And these are:

Twelve Steps

1. We admitted we were powerless over (alcohol, or whatever addiction you are dealing with)—that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood (God).

Admitting we have a problem God can fix.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

Confession

7. Humbly asked (God) to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Repentance

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. 

Continued, regularly scheduled confession and repentance.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood (God), praying only for knowledge of (God’s) will for us and the power to carry that out.

As a result becoming closer with God.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Hoping to share with others the joy of that increased closeness - evangelism!

Do you notice how much of this is focused again on “repentance?”  I know that’s a Christian word for a non-Christian program, but that’s basically what it is.  This is about repentance - admitting your wrongs to God, admitting your wrongs to another, being willing to change those wrong behaviors and to fix the mistakes that you have made.  Looking again and again at your behaviors and “when you are wrong, promptly admitting it.”  People in twelve step programs do this to become whole - they do it to free themselves from their addictions.  And they find that as a result, they are closer to God, closer to experiencing the Divine.  They have “spiritual awakenings” that bring them such joy, such wonder, such change that they cannot help but share it with others - which is what real evangelism is about.  It’s not about “converting” others, it is about sharing your joy and your blessings in a way that is contagious and miraculous and beyond words. 

Well, God calls us to do the same things and for the same reasons.  This hard work of self-reflection and correction which we do weekly in our prayers of confession, which we do seasonally during advent and lent, that is part of the very foundation of our faith.  God calls us to this action not because God wants us to suffer, or feel inferior or feel less whole.  Instead it is because God wants wholeness for us and wants health for us. We cannot be the best we can be without that self-reflection and without being willing to change some things. God also wants this for us because, as I said before, with every step towards wholeness we find new ways to invite God in to our lives, we meet God in new and deeper ways, we experience God in new and fuller ways.  This is the work of a Christian.  It is the work of growing.  It is the work of LIFE because without it we cannot be whole people.  As Richard Rohr says, “Henceforth, it is not "those who do it right go to heaven later," but "those who receive and reflect me are in heaven now." This is God's unimaginable restorative justice. God does not love you if and when you change. God loves you so that you can change. That is the true story line of the Gospel.”

Again, this is not to say that this is easy.  And sometimes it is hard to know where even to start.  So I want to give you a place to start this Advent season.  There are many ways to do this, and this suggestion is just one.  But if you are stuck with how to do this kind of self-reflection, how to do this kind of “repentance”, I suggest one place to start is by looking at your regrets.

Just after college I went as a Volunteer in Mission to a community in North Carolina.  Among other things this community was beginning the process of building a retreat center up in the mountains.  A couple weeks into my stay one of the pastors leading this community, Mike, took me to the site where they hoped to build.  There wasn’t yet a real road up to this site.  So in order to get there, we began the slow, windy trip driving up a very steep logging road that was bordered on one side by the rising wall of the mountain and on the other by a sheer drop off into a valley below.  Mike and I rode in a very old, beat up pick-up truck which was so fragile that the roof of it wasn’t really attached anymore, just kind of hung on by a little metal here and there.  Mostly it just sat with rusting, jagged edges, bobbling and squeaking on the top of the truck.  There were no seat-belts in this truck and the shock absorbers were shot.  It also had no emergency brakes, or at least no way to access them within the body of the truck.  As we bounced and jolted uncomfortably up this steep, cliff-edged trail, I clung to the handle on the door, just praying we would make it safely up to the top so I could announce my decision to never ride up or down this mountain again in this particular vehicle.  I would walk, if I had to, no matter how long it took.  As my head hit the roof and these grumpy unhappy thoughts raced through my head, suddenly the engine on the truck died.  “Stupid truck!”  I thought.  But quickly my annoyance turned into terror.  For along with the engine dying, the breaks went out.  Completely.  The truck paused for a half second and then began to roll back down this windy, steep, cliff-edged hill with amazingly fast acceleration.  As Mike frantically pumped the breaks and reached for the non-existent emergency brake, all the while turning the key and trying desperately to re-start the engine, I knew it was over.  That was it.  This was where my short life would end. 

After what seemed like eternity, but was only a few seconds, Mike, rather calmly, I thought, announced that he would be turning the truck into the side of the mountain to try to slow it down.  He did so with incredible skill, and as the truck backed into the side of the mountain, the truck perched for a minute in space, on the brink of rolling.  If it had tipped over, I would not be with you today, but at the bottom of that cliff.  Instead, after an unsure minute, the truck stopped.

That experience was profound for me.  During those moments when I thought my life was over, much of it did, as the proverbial stories say, flash before my eyes.  Much of what was included in that flash was a plethora of regret.  What things, you might ask, would a 22 year  young woman have to regret?  Well, not too much of my regret was for actions in my past.  Most of it instead was about the future.  I regretted not knowing what it was to be married, I regretted that I would never have children.  I regretted that I hadn’t yet gone to seminary.  I regretted that I had turned down another mission opportunity in favor of this one, I regretted that I was not spending my time in real service to other people, especially those people in the world whom I believe God aches for, hurts for, calls us to empower: the poor, the displaced, the underprivileged. 

Those regrets, while at first painful, became gifts to me in that they allowed me to get a real glimpse into what was really, ultimately important to me: having a family, living a life of service, loving God.  As I’ve gotten older, I’ve tried to keep hold of that self-reflective ability.  Many more of my regrets as a seasoned adult have to do with the past, with choices I’ve made or people I’ve hurt.  But they are still gifts to me: they still tell me about problems I need to address, dreams I need to pursue, behaviors that I need to change. 

Regrets, though painful, are a gift from God.  They show us what is really important to us, pointing out things we need to change, giving us opportunities to make amends, do some healing, and to work through mistakes.  There are things that we regret that we are unable to fix: opportunities that we didn’t take that we may never have again, or people we have hurt who are no longer living or whom it would be impossible or hurtful to find.  There are things we cannot change about the past.  But I deeply believe that God would not give us, or call our attention to, or even allow us to live with these regrets if there was not something to be done with or about them.  I think about how in the Harry Potter series, at the very end, the villain is told that the one way he can save himself is by being willing to look at what he has done and to feel remorse.  The wise characters in the book point out that this remorse is the most painful thing a person can feel.  And yet, that remorse, that willingness to face ourselves and to make changes, this is what brings us ultimate healing, growth and wisdom.  There are lessons to be learned from those regrets that will encourage us to make a different choice in the future: I will not fail in this way again, or I will not choose in this way again.  If amends can be made, they need to be.  If they can’t, maybe other ways can be found to offer good in the name of the thing we regret that we did before.  Regrets can be deep pullings in our lives, calling us to look at something.  We need to not push those uncomfortable feelings away, but stay with them, figure out what God is calling us to do with them, and “repent” in the sense of turning around, choosing a different path.

Advent, the time when we prepare our hearts for God to come to us in a new way, this time is an invitation to do this work.  This is the time to face our regrets.  This is the time to ponder how we are called, in what ways, and in what ways we are not living up to that call or following that call and how we need to do it differently.  This is the time to go deeper so that God may come to us anew, more deeply, more fully, more wholly.

Today’s passages tell the story: we are acceptable, because God loves us no matter what: Jew, Gentile, black, brown, red, yellow, green, purple, short, tall, squatty, whatever.  God loves you.  But because God loves you, God wants to be in real and full relationship with you.  God calls you, therefore, to prepare your hearts in a new way for God’s coming and God’s presence in your hearts, in your lives.

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